What I want.

"But he was pierced for our transgressions,
he was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was upon him,
and by his wounds we are healed." Isaiah 53:5

Think about those words. They werent just picked out of the blue, God chose each one to go in that verse, so that generations upon generations of ppl could read them. periced, crushed, wounds. I just got back from watching Passion of the Christ w/ the bg youth (for the very first time) and I've been freshly affected by what my savior did for me. Let's face it, we all try and make ourselves look good. Nobody wants to think of themselves as a sinner. Everyday I come up with a new reason why I'm worthy to deserve stuff. It's like giving yourself Jesus points. When I do my devotions, my riteous meter goes up a little and I unconciously give myself allowance to be a little more leiniant with chores. We all have areas where we do that. It's so easy to decieve ourselves into thinking were 'good people', even tho we hear and kno the gospel that says were wicked sinners. Seeing this movie gave me a fresh reminder just how false that lie is. While I watched the crucifiction scene, I saw my face among those mocking Jesus. I saw it was ME who was whipping him mercilessly, and spitting on His face. I was the one that drove those nails through his perfect holy hands and held Him to that cross. With every sin I've committed, it was like one more blow that drove the nails in deeper. It's devestating when you really think about how much our sin, that we commit every single day, hurts God. How much pain and suffering it causes Him. How could He love such wretched sinners? I'll never fully understand the depth of His mercy. But what I do understand is that I want to live my life to glorify Him. I'll never be perfect, but I want God's grip on me to be so strong, that everything else I see looks worthless compared to what I have in Christ. That's what i want. What do you want?